Church: Where The Angry People Are

by Mark Tidsworth, Team Leader

I’m almost embarrassed to share this article. Usually we don’t give much attention to the dark side of church life. We rather call attention to the light than point out the darkness. Those who regularly read our articles know this is so. But sometimes, we run into people and churches who remind us we can be our own worst enemies. It seems we take two steps forward, then pause to shoot ourselves in the very same feet which were propelling us forward. What’s that about (an entire additional subject)?

With this in mind, we are willing to spill some ink over one issue in churches which is directly hurting the mission… anger. No, not Holy Spirit inspired anger. Not the anger rising when we witness or experience injustice, giving us the energy to get up and help set this world right. No, not the helpful kind of anger which reacts to the powerful oppressing the powerless. No, the kind of anger described here is far more insidious, disguised as righteous indignation. This is self-serving indignation.

What I mean is that churches can become cultural enclaves who are upset about the radical changes in culture around us. Typically, these are people who previously enjoyed a certain amount of cultural privilege because of their brand of Christianity. They fondly remember the day when being part of a church of a certain kind inherently included some prestige and recognition in one’s community. A person might experience subtle or direct affirmation in the workplace or marketplace due to church participation. Service clubs, educational institutions, and even government recognized and appreciated this person’s church participation. There was a time in this country when being a member of any church raised one’s social standing.

Now, everything’s changed. Sure, there are some places where the culture of Christendom lingers, subtly making an appearance now and then. Yet now many of us live in communities who are suspicious of people who participate in church, imagining all kinds of wild thoughts about who we are and what we do (based on the high-profile negative example of the few).

So there are Christian people who experience this demotion in their church’s social status, reacting with anger. Some perceive themselves as being persecuted. When they gather for meetings, Bible studies, worship, or fellowship events, anger is thick in the air. Their posture toward the world around them is chest out, chin up, and ready for a fight. Newcomers to these churches discover a culture of defensiveness, hostility, and self-righteousness. The prevailing attitude is, “our community needs to repent and get back with it, appreciating us for the good organization we are.” Most everyone who encounters these churches quickly looks for the exit door, thinking to themselves next time they pass that church campus, “that’s where all the angry people are.”

Certainly most Christ-followers are not this way, but those who are feel free to spew their anger over the others, often unchecked by others. This kind of anger is like an emotional virus, infecting and damaging church witness.

So, what’s a church to do when it sees itself in this mirror? What if even a small portion of your church’s people are stuck in their anger?

Recognize the anger as a distress signal.

Those with a healthy theology of emotions recognize the gift our emotions are to us. These Christians and their leadership engage rather than deny emotions, looking for the learning inherent therein. When someone displays and expresses anger, there is typically some kind of hurting going on below the surface. Wise Christian leaders follow the anger, staying with it, peeling back the layers, until the hurt below the anger can be seen. Caring Christian leaders then respond with empathy, recognizing and affirming one’s hurt, whether justified or not. When we are heard, understood, and cared for, often the hurt is on the way to healing.

Raise awareness with accurate information about our cultural context.

I’m always fascinated with how we human beings will find a way to explain our experience, whether we find accurate explanations or not. We are sense-making creatures with a high need to understand what’s happening. When well-meaning people in churches don’t understand the larger dynamics shaping culture in their community, they will invent explanations, which often lead to angry responses. When Christian leaders notice anger currents in their churches, they explore the anger, followed by providing learning experiences which can help make sense of culture change (See Part One in Shift: Three Big Moves For The 21st Century Church).

Present movement-oriented options, inviting your church forward.

Stages of development… understanding that we are works in progress, moving from one growth stage to another, can equip and empower people to let go and move ahead. Anger, frustration, and blame are often included in the early stages of movement involved in the shift from a Modern Era worldview to a Postmodern Era worldview (process of discipleship). When people understand they are simply at one stop in the journey, they give themselves permission to continue the journey.

Return to your first love; the good news of the gospel.

One would think this goes without saying (or writing). One would think. We get so caught up in the running of the church that we lose the why. Return to the why. God so loves this world that God goes to extreme lengths to demonstrate that love, in hopes that many will receive and embrace the beautiful Way of Jesus. What could be better than that? The gospel is life-giving and life-altering. Focusing on ourselves, indulging the false narrative that we deserve cultural privilege, leads to a slow, depressing spiritual death.

Shift from member to disciple identity.

Members of organizations pay their dues in exchange for the rights and privileges available. Membership has its privileges. Membership identity and culture has so very little to do with the gospel of Jesus Christ. Jesus taught that laying down one’s right to membership privileges is actually the way to life. When we forget ourselves, focusing on God and living into God’s calling… that’s when life grows really good. Disciples generally don’t care much about prestige or organizational status since they are so caught up in God’s transformation work.

So, let’s change the perception of far too many in our culture… the perception that church is where the angry people are. Let’s do our work, working out our salvation and moving toward a better expression of church. Let’s be churches who reflect the beautiful Way of Jesus.